Thursday, January 24, 2008

WONKETTE SHORTS - January 24, 2008


Um, yeah, I'll take it large, hot and black. Sure, I would love a little cream - thanks for asking.

Oh good morning! Sorry, you just caught me ordering my coffee. It does get us going in the morning, don't you think?

Let's get to Wonkette Shorts for today. We have a busy day ahead of us.

  • Did you hear that Bush and Cheney may have lied in the run up to Iraq?
  • Lots of hicks are reporting seeing UFOs. It may have something to do with Fred Thompson dropping out of the race, leaving his supporters to seek solace by looking up at the sky where Jesus lives and noticing that there are things that can fly around.
  • Bush is in the White House tonight, clutching the shirt Heath Ledger gave him during one of their trysts in a pup tent at the Crawford Ranch and crying like a little fan girl. On a side note, he is having that rolled up $20 bill found by Heath's body sent to him for inspection, just to be sure.

19 comments:

Nabisco said...

Also:
* Carla Bruni answers the door topless, only occasionally covering herself with one of her pussies (yes, she has two).

BeRightBack said...

@Nabisco: So that's who stole Monique Wittig's. Soon, Sarkozy will have every vagina in France.

litotes said...

Can't believe W'ette didn't notice the fake nuclear attack on Prague.

Quite a hoot and might give Homofascist Army some pointers.

Rats, Google doen't like <img> tags.

BeRightBack said...

@litotes: Awesome! My favorite part of the article is:

Turns out, Ztohoven includes no women. “That's the problem of radicalism,” sighed the threesome's 33-year-old elder statesman, who called himself Roman Tyc. (The pun works in English.) “To get together for pranks is also more difficult now that we're getting into our 30s.

Indeed. Threesomes are tricky.

Hotsauce said...

@litotes: Judging from the coffee pic, HFA could already have its hands full of pointers.

ManchuCandidate (on Strike) said...

The See You Next Thursday story's been picked up by the blogosphere, but still no mention of it on Wonkette (did a sneak and peak.)

You would think that Wonkette would be all over this one.

litotes said...

@ManchuCandidate:

Back in the day, W'ette would indeed have been all over this. Then they went and fired the only editor who knows what an "acronym" is. Not to mention forgetting how to get pageviews without hacking refreshes or putting up a nekkid lady.

fileunder said...

this CST timestamp is throwing off my whole day.

jamie sommers said...

@manchucandidate: What's the see you next Thursday story?

Homofascist said...

@fileunder. Welcome to flyover country.

jamie sommers said...

@manchucandidate: Never mind.

I just got that.

Duh, moran.

ManchuCandidate (on Strike) said...

@jamie,

The Roger Stone one you posted.

I decided to be polite about it and use the lesbian catchphrase for it instead.

fileunder said...

@homofascist:
it's a nice place to visit, but...

BeRightBack said...

@Manchu

Isn't that the "Sex in the City" catchphrase for it? 'cause...that's where I learned it. Stop judging me!

Sigh...I'll be over squealing about Sweet P in the Unbearably Queer Quarantine Area if you need me...

freedumb said...

Is it just me, or is anyone else having trouble concentrating on being snarky what with the beefcake pictures all over this blog? Don't get me wrong, I like it better this way, but still.

ManchuCandidate (on Strike) said...

@berightback,

Heh.

Well, I'm in no position to judge. A girlfriend loved SATC and put a gun to my head (no sex for you) to make me watch it with her. Of course, she grew annoyed with me when I would strangely pay attention to Sam's cougar nakedness.

jamie sommers said...

@berightback: I never really liked SATC. *ducks*

It seemed like a rip-off of The Golden Girls in a way but with younger, shallower women.

Ah well, as Tim Gunn would say, chacon a son gout.

Raging Monk said...

@Nabisco. What a strange coincidence. When I delivered a UPS package to her door, Carla greeted me topless, too! But, women and men love the UPS man in the brown uniform (and the shorts).

BeRightBack said...

@ jamie sommers

Stop judging me!