We hit 1,000 (1,020 to be exact) comments and over 26,000 pageviews on Megan's farewell. And had a lot of fun in the process. Congratulations. The Army grows every day.
The pic is a gift for our efforts from the always fabulous David Flores. You wanted a little beefcake, well here is a little beefcake. You can't get more homo army than 300.
Now hit the showers! I think several of you need cold ones. I'll be around to inspect a couple of you to make sure you have been cleaned to my satisfaction.
88 comments:
Well I'm beat, uh, tired, that is. I'll check back in here sometime by tomorrow, but until then, I need a drink.
Please - everyone who has abandoned Wonkette check in ...
That site must go dark, and we must be the instrument of its doom.
I call for a house meeting tonight on this here blog. After we get done with that, we'll have s'mores and tell spooky stories. C ya there!
Chicago Bureau
(channelling Becky, House Vice-President and Social Chair)
P.S.: we need to discuss what the best plan would be. Homofascist prolly has some options that we could consider that would not be totes backfireish.
Aye aye sir. Heading to the gym, I'll be ready for inspection.
In service,
Rptrcub
1st Armored Hirsute Division
I'll check back here later, hope the discussion is still ongoing.
Hey. Do I get to keep my red cape? I have a really nice old Victorian love seat I want to cover with it.
This is me checking in.
Damn. If not for the circumstances, I would say this has been as much fun as the day Jessica left Gawker.
Those who can support Jim, please do so. Me, I can't stand to look at the Wonkette homepage right now, and my bookmarks have been cast into the cybervoid.
everyone can thank me for planting the completely false rumor that Homo was going to hand out pics of his bf's ass to whoever hit 900 posts. The comments completely went out of sight as soon as I posted that, did you notice?
muahahahah. Now of course I'll be up for Disciplinary Action, of which I will get exactly NONE, being a girl.
Man, I really need to work out more to fit in here. Even my little pink headdress is a smidge snug!
@louisev I don't know, there are a lot of straight guys who have enlisted. You might be okay for a little late night romp in the barracks. Although it would be tough since you will be in the women's barracks and we will be in the men's. That is why it was always such much easier to do the buttsecks - just a bunch of guys around.
Hey, how about After Hours at the Crappy Hour?
checking in, Col. Blogenfreude. I logged out shortly after my last post.
Will not log back in until further notice. (sorry Jim, if you're lurking out there)
Pvt. Sommers
Chick Division
HFA
Col. blogenfreude, SIR,
PFC Cynica ('cause I always go first class, honey), Fag Hag brigade, reporting for duty. I've logged out and Wonkette is Dead To Me (unless we need to go support JIm - just keep me posted).
@homofascist: well unlike yourself and many nubile minions, it's all just a bunch of talk for this old timer. But it seems like the protest is going swimmingly, and we made it to 1,000 in record time with the help of all the new recruits!
congrats!
We shall overCOME!
Major Electoral College Dropout
Enthusiastic Top Division
HFA
@electoral college dropout - it is nice to have you in my favorite division.
Checking in from the road on the Ice Planet of Hoth (NE Montana). Looking forward to my return to the high desert SW at the end of the week.
Codetalker Unit
Kill to Prevent Capture by Enemy
Raging Monk checking in. Early victory in the War on They-That-Hurt-Megan. Now we rest. And scheme. Hey Homofascist, do you have any Jameson in the bar?
Captain Raging Monk, Chaplain
Special Operations Attachment, HFA
Thanks Pvt. Sommers ... we have to show them the power of the Dark Side(tm). And seriously - how can they ignore 2/3 of their readers fleeing elsewhere?
boots polished.
Pvt. Fileunder
Eastern "Rim"
whoops, forgot to check in on this post too.
PFC Whatsername
Long Division
HFA Foreigns Legionaire ManchuCandidate reporting in, Sir.
I'd like Megan to come back, but that isn't like unless Nick does a massive turn about and appoints our girl as Chief Editrix (but again I doubt that.)
I liked what Wonkette represented to me which an outlet for frustrations I can't take out on pols of all stripes but mostly cons for their boneheadedness. As I've said earlier, I love reading many of your comments because they're funny as hell (see my Friends list.) However, if Megan and Greg and Liz Gorman landed on a similar sites I think I'd jump there.
I'm probably going to boycott the Layne postings for the most part and pile on Jim's. I like the guy because he tries and he's landed some good ones (war on Paultards.) Plus Megan has given the word he's a good guy, too.
I'll miss those that chose not to return.
Yeah yeah, buck up soldier. We don't need that maudlin shit here...
Rub some dirt on it, Manchu!
"I don't know, there are a lot of straight guys who have enlisted." - HFA
Right. Ken Layne is offering Carla Bruni in a skimpy bikini with an invitation to zoom in for a close look to inspect for signs of pregnitude, and here it's an army of cartoon beefcake. And I did not intentionally break ranks to delivered an unauthorized pageview. I accidentally saw it when trying to race for the 1,000th comment through the fucked up comment system. You are going to have work a little harder to maintain some psycho-sexual diversity around here. Just sayin ...
@DWSUWF We'll see. I am sure I can come up with something. Those of us of the male-preferring species got NOTHING during the Pareene/Layne years, so if you need to suck it up a little here I am sure you will survive. I have also heard there are places on the internets where you can go to look at naked ladies if you really need to scratch that itch.
Besides, you can have the barracks computer all to yourself. Most of the soldiers will be in the showers for a while.
DWSUWF: This is the sort of discipline that only civilian command and control can provide. Discipline... control.....
Beg your pardon.
Chicago Bureau
Undersecretary for being Under Secretaries
Checking in after 2 days of R&R in the California mountains...
xoxo
Capt. SanFranLefty
Division of Politician Fashion
I have a vast collection of highly modulated heterosexual pornography that can be disseminated among the troops as a morale booster. Some, perhaps, will find it arcane. Others may simply wonder "Where are the titties?" But with time, they will come to see the utter degeneracy of this index, and crawl to it. Again and again.http://youtube.com/watch?v=egCmo5QEo0A
Col. Blogenfreude, sir, checking in, sir!
Sgt. Spangledangel
1st Gunnery Sargent
Derision Division
HFA
So Cal Surf's Up Division, checking in.
@coozledad
Isn't she the Borg Queen from Star Trek?
Late to the comments again. Ya'll just don't keep the same hours as we Texans. Anyway, this is your (apparently) only soldier out on the Texas frontier doin' my duty in spite of ------- (fill in the blank as desired).
i'm putting a link to hfa on the bureau of mockery...that should get us at least two maybe even three more recruits!
Gawd I hate PST. I am skidding in to line before I get a dishonorable discharge. (Not THAT kind.) I choose to represent the naval branch of the HFA because I want to be
AllDaySucka
Petty Officer
HF, sir, bi-coastal 2Truthy reporting for duty from the Left Coast and Chicago, sir.
Capt. SanFranLefty, are you the one to see about that pithe helmut?
(The Brits are masters at aiming for the sexiest organ of the body and I'M not about to take that bullet...)
But can somebody please photoshop Janet Reno in the middle of those beefcakes or consider an extra pic? (Would make the ettesters around here feel more fair and balanced and shitfaced.)
I forgot to tell you I sent a tip on Friday about the Wonkette meltdown to Fake Steve Jobs who loves to rag on Denton - I don't think he's done anything yet on his blog. we'll see.
okay, time to drink. Will check in later with Generalisimo Homofascist.
Okay, maybe I am being just a tad naive and over the top. But isn't that a bit what This Man's (and Fag-Hag's) Army is all about? Looking at the excellent presentation of this blog, considering that it was whipped together in no time atall by our beloved General Homo, it occurs me:
More than one person has made the observation that it is the comments that have really contributed to the overall success of the Gawker empire, and that without the Ette core of Wonkette, Megan, Wonkette is but a pale shadow of itself.
BUT WE'VE GOT MEGAN. At least, until she begins pouring her lifeblood into another thankless and poorly paid blog. Why don't we... um... do this ourselves? And instead of Megan slaving away posting 10 or 20 articles for us to blab about she could do vacation duty of say one or two and the more talented and motivated of us can chip in and do a modest half dozen features a day?
Stupid? Silly? I don't know about you but I haven't had as much fun organizing a coordinated internet activity since I first discovered Wonkette and met all you fine people.
How big is the Army after all? 40 people? 60? We have the technology, we have the MAN-and-chickpower.
donzacatl, not only are you late but you misspelled y'all.
And you call yourself a Texan.
Drop (your pants) and give me twenty!
I heard she was on Star Trek. What an oddly beautiful woman. Sort of a cross of an Egon Schiele model and Ingrid Bergman. The guy is really beautiful too, and I say that heterosexually. The face casting reminds me of Zafferelli. The film reminds me of drug related decompensation. My own, in fact.
It's based on a novella by a guy who was a linguistic contemporary of Adolf Hitler. And he could have been Adolf's sweetly crazy brother. He ultimately died wandering away from the institution to which he was voluntarily committed, frozen in a hillock of snow.
@coozle
Yeah she was even good looking bald, painted green, with prostehtics,loops of wires and tubes in and out of her head, and human only from the neck up.
@sflefty
I am very disappointed in you. I think the law still permits you to withdraw the absentee ballot and change your registration up to midnite tomorrow.You still have time to regain my respect.
(exxxcuuuuse me c-dad, but DID I give you permission to post? I DO NOT REMEMBER doing so!!!!111! the next time you dredge up that kakfa-esque shit in a time of great depression, please know I am going to swat you in an unpleasing way)
louisev: (lovingly) duh! why can't Megan just post here or at her own place and sell ads?!?!1 It's probably much more difficult than I think it is but Gilliard mananged to live {modestly in Harlem until he died - what? as those crazy kids say, too soon?} < actually at 48, that is a little too soon for me > and Aravosis is managing in DC (all kids to us, right? - I'm nearly 48 & I take it (based on prior comments and NOTHING else that you are at least contemplating said age) Of course, I'm also drunk. Nothing to do with c-dad just that the wine was convenient and it was way too cold to go outside any more than necessary.
@coozledom:
Yep, you hit it on the head. 1959 was a good year for us bleeding heart liberals.
And yes, it probably is much harder than it appears, but we are sitting here typity typing away, and there are like, DOZENS OF US just aching for something to do to carry the torch, and well, I just got thinking is all!
1959? There's more than one of us? I don't have to play Creepy Oldest Hipster in the Room?
Hold on, need to dust off my long-retired Gilligan's Island references...
we'll need to get beyond this blogpost soon, won't we?
here's a list of sites we need to register:
HFAForums.com
HFA2008.com
HFABoards.com
HFABlimp.com
HFANation.com
HFARevolution.com
HFAOnline.com
SeniorsForHFA.com
HFABlog.com
HFAHQ.com...
QueerHFA.com
kidding everyone :)
that debate left me a little loopy.
@Louisev - 1959? 1959!!? 1959!!? Do I Look THAT old? Good God, Goddammit! I was born in 1960! But - uh, yeah. Whatever you say. c-dad was born in '61 and is a young'un.
Oops! Nojo - you're an old shit too? And here I thought you were young, hot, gay ass. Oh well - no skin off my particular teeth as the saying goes.
wow, wow! just... wow. Vonnegut was right about those Korasses. 1959 is a special, permanent and indelible korass that keeps getting us caught up in its web! who woulda thought!!!
nojo: You're the cooterpede neologist. I should have known you were old and bitter. Hell, the world is making kids like Megan way old before their time. Thats just one aspect of this jackleg administration I'd like to see punished with grisly fiery death.
1959? I was 7 when the Dodgers moved to LA in 1958.
coozledad: I should have known you were old and bitter.
Well, when your years coincide with the prime of Mad and Spy, something nasty's bound to happen...
@ fileunder: hey sweetie, you forgot:
HFA-EVOL-ution.
@donzacatal: I'm with Jamie here. How can you misspell "y'all"??? Where in Tejas are you? perhaps my parents can rendezvous with you in the Hill Country for some bar-BEEE-Que. Though I will get heartsick for some Salt Lick barbecue (and the cute UT frat boys waiting tables at Salt Lick)
@dwsuwf: You don't understand. My ballot for Mr. Unicorn & Rainbow Barry Obama is signed, sealed and DELIVERED. There's something you should know - I grew up in Texas. I would sooner shoot myself in the head than vote for Ron Paul. I am all too familiar with those crazy Texas fucks who like to call themselves libertarians yet still want to regulate my uterus, my drugs, and my gay friends. So no. I will not vote for Ron Paul even if I could play some weird games with the GOP primary. If it's any consolation, in 1996, when I was living in Austin and it was open primaries, I voted for Patrick Buchanan in the Republican primary just to fuck with the GOPers. Is that good enough for you?
Reporting for duty in the fabulous HFA!
I want to join the HFA Liberation Army, and wear a beret a la Tania Hearst.
Muerte o patria!
Well, since some of us are budding AARP recruits...
Hey, how about those gas lines of 1973? Sure glad they solved that problem in our lifetimes!
Well, I broke protocol and checked over on the blog. Their liveblog was -- well, they had some traffic. About 10,000 pageview across three threads, with over 300comments. Lemonjello the only name of note, but still, that was... well...
@David P - what are you doing on the internets? I'm too old to be here and you're way older than me (THANKS for that!!1!)
Note: I went over out of pure curiosity. I'm still on board -- don't you worry. But with noobs and Lemonjello, they can still get traffic. Maybe it'll dry up, but maybe not.
Besides Pet Shop Boys and "Bee-VAAAAH!" (which I'd have Southside Johnny sing at baseball games as our new national anthem), does this revolution have a sound track?
I'd say mix in some rage against the machine, Metallica's "Disposable Heroes" for Meegs herself, and that piece by Shostokovich from the battle of Stalingrad to start.
Someone clue Lemonjello in. He/she may not know what's going on. (Hard for us to understand but easy enough if you don't scroll back to Friday.)
I'd let Lemonjello know about the boycott, but I'm a bit of a dunce, you see.
Oh, and before you kids flee in terror...
Jon Stewart: 1962
Madonna: 1958
I know, the Madonna angle doesn't work anymore. But you don't want to see me humping a cross, either.
redmanlaw: I proposed Monty Python's "Sit on My Face," but the Central Committee wasn't amused.
CB: If Ken wants Dave Barry's audience, he can have it.
Hey Coozlemominatrix: I donno, my kids taught me some stuff. And I can try to stay in touch with them with IM because, y'know, they never call.
Gad, looks like Defamer (my original home) is getting Gawkered as well -- no shitcanning, but you can see the clutter starting to build. I just might be getting a lot of work done this year...
AZ_Squeegee, AKA plutoboy, here. I'm not disciplined enough for any army, but I'm more than happy to
join any quirky band of irregulars helping with the resistance.
Here's a lullaby for you hard old warriors. I hope it rips the heart out of you as it does me.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ugB-CgoIfdU
Re:coozledad
Well, I suppose we could mount it on a tracked vehicle of some sort . . .
redmanlaw: I have some artifacts you might be interested in . I'm trying to figure out which unfortunate people occupied the site where I live. It looks like an extensive woodland occupation. I suspect, given the available history of the area,, and my limited digs, it's an eastern Siouan group. But I would be a total asshole if I just automatically assumed that was the case.
coozledad- interested in artifacts, but must sleep now. Ironically, I am now on the Ft Peck Assiniboine-Sioux resv. on a case.
Bill Richardson is covering bets - most advisors are going w/Hill but 2 big money guys are with the O, as is my firm. joemonahan.com
Fresh Clichès Privates reporting for duty!!
I was away on bidness this past week, and didn't see horror until Saturday night/Sunday morning.
Count me in on leaving a flaming bag-o-dog-shit on GM's doorstep.
david p - I was 7 when the Braves left Milwaukee for Atlanta in '66.
The rest of you, get off my lawn.
Sorry, Jamie honey, it is indeed spelled "y'all", and I just typo'd. After considering falling on my sword, I decided to fall on BF's sword instead. Does that count as dropping pants and giving 20?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wonkette
needs updating
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wonkette
Updated as of this morning!
Larry's Craig:
Looks good!
I'm a little late, but I came! ;)
What do we do next?
Greg's back?
See today's headline post
The wikipedia edit was teh awesome. Well done.
Wait. Did I just say "wikipedia" and "well done" in the same breath? I need to sit down.
Megan "Carpenter"/Wonkette in Page Six:
http://www.nypost.com/seven/01222008/gossip/pagesix/we_hear_______we_hear_462601.htm
and subsequent post noting the spelling error on Gawker...
Checking in. I've installed myself as a Major due to my actual special ops trainging but will serve at the pleas...er, needs...er, serve where needed by the commander.
Now where's the bar and the straight tent?
G'morning from the trenches, comrades.
I missed command orders #303 through #612, but seem to understand that we are digging in and refusing all traffic to the 'ette.
Further marching orders, sir?
Nabisco
Ministry of Petit Dejauner
Thanks, anonymous, your link got truncated. Megan "Carpenter" on the Post at Page Six
@moncrief: Lemonjello knows. He posted on the goodbye thread.
@SanFranLefty: The lack of party registration is one of the things I miss most about TX. You could vote in any party's primary and fuck them up just for the hell of it. Here in Az, I actually had to register as a Republican in '00 to keep my streak of voting against Shrub alive. Ugh.
@donzacatl: That'll do. Good work.
In service to HFA,
Pvt. Sommers
Sgt IanJ, 1st Hippie Cavalry, two-wheeled division and Subordinate Sergeant at Arms, checking in, sleepy. Mwah. <yawn>
I can't claim any great age, but I still distinctly remember looking up at my parents during the 80 election and asking whether relatives in California voted for Regan, 'cause they wouldn't do that, right? Politics kind of died for me between then and discovering Wonkette a couple years ago, although Bloom County made a valiant effort.
Coozledad: Thanks for the lullaby last night - worked like a charm when I went to bed around 5:30 this a.m. (Can't believe I am awake again at this horribly early hour!) You just don't hear too much of those old Scots ballads, especially sung properly (although her harp technique was a wee bit strange).
All the oldsters: We are one in the spirit...I was born the same year as David P. - we high school grads of 1969 are truly unique in the world. It was a comfort to know I am not the only soldier old enough to remember VietNam and the beginning of the AIDS scourge (that wiped out 2/3 of the people I toked and dropped and boozed with in college).
The HFA Pacific Fleet would like to remind Submarine Squadron officers that Finding Nemo's Privates is not appropriate off-duty entertainment.
I'm still wading through the 1000+ comments but had to chime in and report for duty.
@rickushay: my actual special ops training
Be warned that "drill sergeant" has a different meaning around here.
@nojo-
I know. I'm going to have to avoid phrases like "penetrating behind enemy lines" and such without including louisev's name for proper breeder context.....
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